The center of East Mountain’s work is relationships. Our intentional connections with people provide the context for the conversations and learning environments where we offer powerful experiences that we pray lead people closer to Jesus. This work begins with the simple and profoundly complex work of building friendships, often across cultures. This story highlights the blessing and difficulty involved in relationally centered work in Bangkok.
Since my feet hit the ground here (about 6 months ago), I've had an overwhelming desire to build friendships with Thais. We all show up eager to have friendships with locals - it is a huge reason as to why we are here.
I thought that the best way to find Thai friendships was to attend a local Thai church, so that’s the adventure I’ve been on! Seemed simple on paper, but the reality is it’s way harder and takes way longer to have Thais welcome you into their world than what I initially anticipated.
Most Sundays feel a lot like Thai language class - I’m continually observing, translating in my head, picking up on social cues, and trying to be engaged on a more personal level. Oh yeah – and reminding myself to smile instead of wearing my “face of focus.” A lot of times I still have no idea what’s being said. I've been learning how to navigate meeting new people, introducing myself, and being culturally sensitive in an honor/shame culture. It is quite a challenge when your language is sub-par.
These “transitions” have resulted in me speaking with few people while waiting for others to welcome conversation. It’s a big mindset shift when you recognize that friendship formation is not something we control. My leader put it well when he said that often times we show up expecting to love on the "foreigner" and "stranger" and then we find out that we're that person. This should be an obvious thing for us, but it really isn't. We come here ready to love the stranger and welcome the foreigner, and then realize we are actually the one at the mercy of others. God is the One who has to open the right doors for relationships to form.
Last month I showed up to a church outing at a bowling alley, what ended up being a huge breakthrough for me. It was the environment I needed to connect in a new, more natural way. It allowed me to speak more Thai and show that I am learning and invested. It also allowed me to teach Thais how to bowl! Relationships take time, especially if the people in them come from different walks of life. Sometimes you just have to sit there and absorb new words. Sometimes you have to give yourself a pep talk to get the courage to introduce yourself. Sometimes you just have to smile. But I’m learning a lot about patience and trust most of all – if Father wants me to have a group of local Thai friends, the reality is that He’s already got the right ones picked out!
from Bailey Debree, East Mountain Bangkok Intern